A match made in heaven, a match made in hell. These lines refer to the Randy Savage and Miss Elizabeth wedding and the Hogan/Warrior vs. Triangle of Terror match. This is the fourth annual Summerslam pay per view and the card is stacked full of grueling rivalries. Tonight both the tag team titles and Intercontinental titles will be on the line as well as, for the first time ever, the Million Dollar Championship. On top of that we have the first ever Jailhouse match between The Big Boss Man and The Mountie.

There isn’t too much to report since the last pay per view, UK Rampage. Tugboat turned heel and joined forces with Earthquake, renaming himself Typhoon. Also Jake Roberts turned heel on The Ultimate Warrior and sides with The Undertaker. Both of those men aren’t in action though. Also The Iron Sheik returned as Sgt Slaughters ally, Colonel Mustafa. Ricky “The Dragon” Steamboat also returned to the WWF and tonight he teams up with fellow babyfaces The British Bulldog and Texas Tornado. Tonight we will also see in ring PPV debuts for General Adnan and Irwin R Shyster.

For the first ever time we go to ringside where the commentators are. Gorilla Monsoon anchors as play by play and he’s joined by both Bobby “The Brain” Heenan and “Rowdy” Roddy Piper. They tell us about the match made in heaven as Randy Savage and Miss Elizabeth tie the knot and the match made in hell which is the 3 on 2 handicap main event. It’s a quick summary before we go to our opening contest.

Ricky “The Dragon” Steamboat, The Texas Tornado & The British Bulldog vs. The Warlord and Power & Glory (Hercules & Paul Roma)

An impressive entrance from Ricky Steamboat who comes out in a dragon looking costume breathing fire. The three babyfaces get their full entrance whilst the heels are already stood in the ring with their manager Slick. Ricky Steamboat starts the match for his team and it’s his first match on PPV since Wrestlemania VI. Steamboat is a former Intercontinental champion and has a 77% success rate on pay per view. Paul Roma starts the match against him. And it’s Roma with the advantage in the early going. Power and Glory and The Warlord all got big wins at last years Summerslam over The Rockers and Tito Santana respectively.

Steamboat hits his deep arm drags and then tags out to Tornado whilst Roma tags Hercules. Tornado actually won the Intercontinental championship at last years Summerslam. The Warlord in now and briefly in is The Bulldog before tagging out to Steamboat. This is the perfect match to open the card as it’s quick and features guys that will get the crowd pumped up. Roma in now and he seems more concerned with the guys outside the ring which allows Steamboat to roll him up for what seems like a three count before The Warlord gets involved. The heels were joined by Rick Martel at Survivor Series last year as The Visionaries and they were the winning team. Tornado hasn’t actually won a match since last years Summerslam.

Hercules in now after some classic heel double teaming and he keeps The Dragon grounded. Herc tags out to Warlord who looks massive compared to Steamboat. Warlord tags out to Roma who continues the beatdown. Hercules in and Steamboat gets the upper hand. Amazing to think that these two guys (Steamboat and Hercules) faced each other at Wrestlemania 2. Warlord back in and he slams Steamboat down. Warlord then goes up to the second rope but Ricky gets his boots up! And Steamboat tags out to Tornado who goes mad on everybody! Warlord goes for a sunset flip though and Tornado tags Bulldog!

And all hell breaks loose as Bulldog gets near falls on Warlord and Roma. Then Bulldog tags Steamboat and hits a high cross body which gets the three count! It’s a big win for three big babyfaces! Bulldog wins for the third PPV in a row, Tornado finally gets a win after a year and Steamboat wins on his first PPV match back! A great way to start the show.

Rating: 7/10

Backstage to Sean Mooney who is with Mr Perfect and Coach. Perfect lets Bret Hart know that he’s excellent but he’s not perfect. Coach blows his whistle.

Mr Perfect (c) vs. Bret “Hitman” Hart – Intercontinental Championship Match

Bret Hart has his first ever singles match on pay per view against the Intercontinetnal champion Mr Perfect. This should be a good one. I’m not really sure what the point of Coach is but with Bobby Heenan moving into commentary full time, it gives Perfect a manager. Bret Hart gives his sunglasses to a fan at ringside for the first ever time. Hart starts well, throwing Perfect across the ring and knocking him down with a shoulder block. Heenan has already had some classic lines on commentary, mostly aimed at Roddy Piper. Hitman locks in a headlock as both men try grabbing each others hair. Bret hits a cross body and gets a near fall followed by another.

Bret then locks in another side headlock. It’s been an extremely smooth transition for Bret Hart to go from tag team wrestler to singles. Perfect hits a knife edge chop but Hart soon gets the advantage and sends Perfect over the top rope to the outside. He then starts walking to the back but Hart comes after him and throws him back into the ring. Perfect acts the cowardly heel which works for him. Harts parents Stu and Helen are there and I think Helen is wearing sunglasses. Perfect gets the advantage from a cheap shot and then kicks Bret to the outside. Perfect doesn’t let him come back in either, throwing him into some bloke on the outside! Back in the ring and Hart hits some right hands and gets a near fall.

Perfect back on top after the kickout and he throws Hart from pillar to post before hitting a snapmare and getting a near fall.  A dropkick sends The Hitman to the outside again. Both men not only on the outside but up on the second turnbuckle! Perfect sends Hart into the ring and gets another near fall! Perfect slaps Hart around in the corner  and then throws him across the ring by his hair. Vicious. Bret Hart won the tag titles with Jim Niedhart at last years Summerslam. Could it be two titles in two years for The Hitman? It’s not looking good at the moment as Perfect throws him across the ring again. Perfect goes for the Perfect-plex but Hart kicks out at 2 and nobody can believe it!

Heenan screams that nobody has ever kicked out of the Perfect-plex! Hart on the comeback now as he hits atomic drops! Hart with a couple of near falls. Perfect could really do with a victory, he hasn’t won on pay per view since Survivor Series 1989! And he’s wrestled on every PPV since. Hart hits his elbow from the second rope and gets a 2. As he argues with the referee Perfect rolls him up but Hart kicks out! Perfect goes to the outside and so does Bret. Hart sends his opponent into the ringpost and then rolls him back in. Hart looks like he’s really matured as a wrestler. He goes for the Sharpshooter now but Coach gets up on the apron and Hart punches him off. The crowd are behind Bret Hart as he lays on the canvas. He then blocks a stomp from Perfect and manages to lock in the Sharpshooter! Perfect doesn’t look like he tapped out but he did! We have a new Intercontinental champion and it’s Bret Hart! He celebrates by ripping Perfect singlet off! An excellent match.

Rating: 8/10* Match Of The Night

Lord Alfred Hayes is stood by as Bret Hart hugs his parents. He asks Stu what he thinks and Stu says about two inaudible words before Hayes cuts him off!

Now backstage to Mene Gene who is stood by with The Bushwhackers and Andre The Giant. Jimmy Hart tried to take on Andre as a client but when Andre turned it down Earthquake attacked him with his megaphone! The Bushwhackers say they’ll feed Earthquake and Typhoon to Andre when they’re done!

The Natural Disasters (Earthquake & Typhoon) vs. The Bushwhackers (Butch & Luke)

Well The Bushwhackers and Typhoon haven’t been on PPV since the Royal Rumble so this is a big opportunity for them. Earthquake has featured prominently. Typhoon actually turned his back on The Bushwhackers when he was Tugboat to join forces with Earthquake. Andre joins The Bushwhackers outside the ring much like he did with The Big Boss Man at Wrestlemania and The Rockers at UK Rampage. Typhoon starts the match for his team with Butch and soon all hell breaks loose and all four men are in there. The Bushwhackers throw Typhoon into Earthquake and then hit the battering ram on Typhoon! They double clothesline Earthquake and the crowd go wild for The Bushwhackers! It would be a huge win for those guys.

Earthquake in now though and dominating Butch. Not for long though as he misses an elbow but Butch can’t tag out. Quake does though and in comes Typhoon. Typhoon continues the domination and hits hands over Butch to Earthquake. Bobby Heenan leaves ringside now, something about Hogan being in the building and Heenan wants to embarrass him. Typhoon back in but Earthquake accidentally nails him! Typhoon actually has the highest average match rating up to this point but then he has only had two matches. Butch tags Luke and the fresh man is all over Typhoon. The Bushwhackers hit the Battering Ram on both guys but can only get a two count. Luke then gets squashed between both Natural Disasters and Earthquake hits the big Earthquake splash before getting the three count! A big win for The Natural Disasters who team up for the first time on PPV.

After the match The Disasters go after Andre but here come The Legion Of Doom! And they send The Natural Disasters packing! There’s definitely money in that feud down the road.

Rating: 5.75/10

Backstage to Bobby Heenan who is at a door with a piece of paper on that says “Hulk”. Heenan then has the wCw World Heavyweight title and on behalf of Ric Flair challenges The Hulkster! The door opens and slams in Heenans face.

Backstage to Randy Savage now dressed in tie-dye. Savage is on the phone to somebody and tells them he has everything in place. Savage has a honeymoon lined up.

And now we go to Ted Dibiase and Sensational Sherri. We go through some humiliating abuse that Virgil had to endure at the hands of Dibiase. Dibiase says that Virgil will be humiliated tonight.

“The Million Dollar Man” Ted Dibiase (c) vs. Virgil – Million  Dollar Championship Match

A lot of history in this one. Virgil was obviously Dibiases’s bodyguard for three years before the split. Virgil has had two matches on pay per view and he’s won them both! So not a bad record at all. And he goes right after Dibiase before the bell has even rung. He knows Ted down with clothesline and then sends him out of the ring! Dibiase hasn’t had a bad 12 months since last years Summerslam, on PPV he won a Survivor Series match, he won a tag match over Dusty and Dustin Rhodes at The Royal Rumble and he beat Texas Tornado at UK Rampage. Virgil has the advantage now though. Well that is until he misses a cross body over the top rope!

Bobby Heenan is back now and he’s touting Ric flair as the real World Champion which makes you think something big is on the horizon. Dibiase slams Virgils head off the steps now before throwing him back into the ring. Ted keeps the advantage clotheslining his challenger to the floor. A double axe handle keeps the challenger down. Dibiase is in the top 10 for most PPV matches, most PPV wins and most PPV main events. And he hits a big back body drop on Virgil. Dibiase goes for a clothesline but Virgil ducks and then locks on The Million Dollar Dream! As Dibiase drops to one knee though Sensational Sherri slides in and smashes Virgil with her handbag! Funny how the commentators made it clear earlier that the title can’t change by disqualification.

Instead of it being a DQ though, the referee demands that Sensational Sherri must go to her locker room and the match must continue! Tony Garea is out to make sure she goes back and she’s gone! It’s Virgil now who would go top of the “highest win percentage” list if he were to win this one. He goes for an irish whip but Dibiase reverses it and Virgil goes flying into the referee which takes both men down! Dibiase takes a minute to scream at Virgils trainer Roddy Piper before suplexing Virgil down. He then hits a second suplex! And a third. Dibiase then says he’s got another one for Piper. The crowd chant for Roddy but Teddy hits a piledriver.

The referee is still out of it and Dibiase kicks the ref back down. He then takes the turnbuckle pad off but Virgil reverses it and slams Dibiase into the exposed steel! He crawls over to Dibiase and covers him, getting the three count! Virgil is the new Million Dollar Champion and he celebrates with the gold!

Rating: 5.5/10

Backstage now to Mene Gene and The Mountie. He’s confident that he’ll beat The Big Boss Man tonight. We then go to Sean Mooney who is with The Boss Man and unsuprisingly he’s confident that he’ll beat The Mountie.

The Big Boss Man vs. The Mountie – Jailhouse Match

Well this match between two policemen was inevitable. The loser of this match has to spend the night in a cell and the match begins with the Boss Man slapping Mountie in the face! It’s back and forth though until the Boss Man splashes The Mountie. The Boss Man is on the list of most wins on pay per view so he’ll be looking to continue that whilst The Mountie is on the highest win percentage having won both of his PPV matches. Mountie hits a thumb to the eye but as he goes up top, The Boss Man catches him and slams him down.

Jimmy Hart is vocal on the outside as per usual. He distracts Boss Man long enough for The Mountie to get the advantage. And he takes Boss Man down with a flying elbow. Mountie dominates for a while now and he takes Boss Man out to the outside. Jimmy Hart continues to talk down to the big man and as he slides back in, The Mountie catches him with some stomps. Mountie bites Boss Man to keep the advantage and then hits a piledriver! Mountie then motions at Jimmy Hart who climbs up onto the apron. It’s a distraction long enough for Mountie to grab the cattle prod but Boss Man gets out of the way and smashes The Mountie down with an uppercut! He then throws him into the ropes and nails the Boss Man Slam! But Mountie kicks out!

The Mountie manages to trip The Big Boss Man up and once again goes for a piledriver but Boss Man hits an Alabama Slam and gets the three count! Boss Man picks up the big win and then holds his opponents hands so the local police can handcuff him! Mountie gets escorted to the back much to the crowds delight! We then see Mountie lugged to the back and thrown in the police van! The weakest match of the card so far. Didn’t have the excitement some of the other bouts had.

Rating: 4/10

Backstage to Mene Gene who is quickly interrupted by Ted Dibiase and Sensational Sherri who are not happy! They claim Virgil stole the belt.

And now to Sean Mooney who is with new Intercontinental champion Bret Hart. Hart says there’s no such thing as Perfect and he just wasn’t good enough.

Back to Mene Gene who is with Jimmy Hart and the Natural Disasters. Hart isn’t happy with The Mountie losing but the Disasters are more focused on taking down The Legion of Doom.

An d now back to Sean Mooney and The Big Boss Man. What kind of bird can’t fly? A jailbird, that’s who. Boss Man promised he is the law and order and he proved it by defeating The Mountie.

Sean links back to Mene Gene who is now in Randy Savage’s locker room. Savage is still on the phone and as Gene sneaks off to talk to Elizabeth, Randy tells him not to!

And now we go to The Mountie who is being dragged into his jail cell! He keeps shouting that he is The Mountie but it makes no difference!

Sean Mooney now is joined by Jimmy Hart and The Nasty Boys.  Saggs isn’t happy with Jack Tunney and Knobbs says they’ll be defeating The Legion Of Doom tonight. Now we go back to The Mountie who has his mugshot taken! Hart is fuming and says his lawyers will hear about this.

And now to Mene Gene with the Legion Of Doom. There’ll be no count out tonight, no disqualification. Animal makes a challenge to the Natural Disasters whilst Hawk concentrates on The Nasty Boys. What a Rush!!

Back to The Mountie who sticks his middle finger up and gets his fingerprints taken! Controversial with the sign language!

Now to Sean Mooney who is with Sgt Slaughter and company. Slaughter says that Warrior still looks a bit snakebitten and Hogan has a big gash on his head.

Mene Gene with Sid Justince now. Sid, who is the referee for the main event tonight, talks through his teeth and says that he is a man who looks out for himself. We’re then shown some footage of Sid talking to Sgt Slaughter and company. Sid says justice will be served tonight.

The Nasty Boys (c) (Jerry Saggs and Brian Knobbs) vs. The Legion Of Doom (Animal & Hawk) – Tag Team Championship Match

The Nasty Boys who won the tag team titles at Wrestlemania from The Hart Foundation take on The Legion Of Doom who beat Power and Glory in their last PPV outing. All hell breaks loose before the bell and all four men go at it outside of the ring. Animal then hits a powerbomb on Knobbs inside the ring but Saggs breaks up the pinfall. Hawk hits an enzeguri on Saggs and takes the big man down. As Animal distracts the referee Saggs sprays something in Hawks eyes! Finally order is restored as Knobbs and Animal exit the ring. Hawk exits the ring and Saggs attacks him with a tray! Saggs tags in Knobbs and The Nasty Boys double team Hawk.

The crowd are right behind The Legion Of Doom in this one as The Nasty Boys continue their double teaming. Heenan announces that Sid isn’t in his locker room, where is he? Hogans locker room? Slaughters? In the ring Hawk hasn’t had any success since being sprayed in the eyes. Knobbs gets a near fall and then tags in Saggs. Quick tags from the Nasty Boys and lots of double teaming. Good heel tactics. Saggs goes up top and hits an elbow but Animal breaks up the pin. Knobbs tries for a similar move but Hawk gets his boot up and then Hawk tags Animal! Animal is on fire, taking both guys down!

All four men in the ring now but Hawk gets thrown out and The Nasty Boys double team Animal. Jimmy Hart then throws in the helmet and Saggs smashes animal with it! But Knobbs can only get a two count! Hawk grabs the helmet off Jimmy Hart and smashes both Nasties with it! Animal then puts Saggs on his shoulders and Hawk hits the Doomsday Device! Animal pins Saggs and we’ve got new champions! The Legion of Doom have been hot since debuting at Summerslam last year and deserve the titles. Three title changes tonight as Perfect, Dibiase and The Nasty Boys lose out to Bret Hart, Virgil and The Nasty Boys!

Rating: 5.75/10

And now back to The Mountie who shows a lot of charisma as he gets thrown into his cell!

Irwin R Shyster vs. Greg “The Hammer” Valentine 

IRS gives us a great speech about paying taxes. This is actually the PPV debut of IRS although he did feature on the first Wrestlemania in a losing attempt against The Iron Shiek and Nikolai Volkoff under his real name. Valentine starts the match with a headlock. Not many guys have had as many PPV matches as Valentine. He beat Haku at Uk Rampage but lost to Earthquake at Wrestlemania. He takes IRS down with a couple of shoulder blocks. He then hits a hiptoss and a clothesline sending IRS to the outside. Valentine still on top with a powerslam which sends IRS reeling. After a cheap shot the tax man gets the advantage and locks in an abdominal stretch, using the top rope for leverage.

After getting out of it, Irwin hits a big clothesline and an elbow but Valentine kicks out of the pinfall attempt. IRS locks on a sleeper in a match that the crowd really aren’t enjoying. With Valentine down, IRS goes up top but Greg throws him off the top buckle! Valentine hits some right hands and chops and then kicks him down to the canvas. Valentine then motions for the figure four! IRS stretches out and grabs the ropes. Valentine is so damn boring. He goes for an elbow but IRS rolls out of the way but Valentine takes IRS down again before headbutting him in the groin. He then goes for the figure four but IRS rolls him up and gets a three count! A big PPV debut victory for Irwin R Shyster!

Rating: 3/10

Backstage now to Mene Gene with Hulk Hogan and The Ultimate Warrior. Hogan needs to wipe out Slaughter tonight or things will never be the same again. Ultimate Warrior talks his usual garbage but generally says that he and Hogan will win.

Hulk Hogan & The Ultimate Warrior vs. The Triangle Of Terror (Sgt Slaughter, Colonel Mustafa & General Adnan)

This is the third (of four) Summerslams to have a tag team main event and they have all involved Hulk Hogan. The other main event was last years contest between Ultimate Warrior and Rick Rude. The crowd go wild for the babyfaces! Both of which have two of the most wins in PPV history as well as highest win percentages and most main events. Sid Justice is the referee for this one which is a huge introduction to WWF pay per view for him. It’s Hulk Hogan that starts the match with Sgt Slaughter. This is the third pay per view in a row that these two have been on the opposite side of the ring.

Slaughter and Hogan lock up and it’s Slaughter with the early advantage. Not for long though as Hogan and Warrior take shots at the former World Heavyweight champion. Tag made to The ultimate Warrior and they take Slaughter down with a double clothesline. Another quick tag to Hogan who gets the first near fall of the match. Big forearm from Hulk then a tag to Warrior. More double teaming then a tag to Hogan. The crowd boo as Sid breaks up Hogans corner punches. Slaughter gets a cheap shot and then tags out to General Adnan who is making his in ring PPV debut tonight. Mustafa and Adnan double team Hogan as Slaughter distracts Warrior and Sid. Mustafa is the main man now and he locks the camel clutch on Hogan! But Warrior breaks it up.

Slaughter tagged back in now and he irish whips Hogan into Sid. Slaughter then tags out to Adnan. Here’s a good fact, there has only been one PPV up to now in which the final match of the night was won by a heel. And that was Survivor Series 1987 when Andre the Giant won the Survivor Series match main event.

Anyway, Hogan tags out to Warrior and he goes mad on Slaughter before inadvertently running into referee Sid Justice. Slaughter manages to regain the advantage and he tags out to General Adnan who in turn tags out to Mustafa. Warrior blocks a suplex and hits one of his own! But some crafty heel tactics and double teaming gives Slaughter the advantage. He knocks Warrior down with a clothesline but tries again and Warrior hits a shoulder tackle. Hogan reaches for the tag as the crowd clap along. Warrior tags Hogan! Hogan hits some right hands and then hits the big boot but all hell breaks loose! Incomes Mustafa and Warrior! Warrior then chases off Mustafa and Adnan with the steel chair!

Hogan then gets some powder out of his trunks and throws it in Slaughters face before dropping the leg! He covers Slaughter and gets the three count for the big win! Hogans tally of PPV wins in a row goes up to  having not lost since losing in the main event of Wrestlemania VI. Hogan celebrates in the ring much to the enjoyment of the crowd. He then motions towards the locker room and we see Sid Justice poking his head through the curtain. Sid comes back out and poses with The Hulkster. A pretty weak main event really.

Match Rating: 4.5/10

Backstage to The Mountie now who is locked up with a couple of gay men. Hilarious.

We then watch a clip of Randy Savage proposing to Miss Elizabeth. And now a touching montage of Savage and Elizabeth. Jesus Christ this is cheesy.

“Macho Man” Randy Savage marries Miss Elizabeth

Interesting that they’re ending the show with this. I would have thought it’d be midway through the show. Savage comes out in gold and pink wrestling gear to get married in. He looks smart despite all the tassels. Then out comes Elizabeth in her white dress. And here we go. Does Randy Savage take Elizabeth as his lawfully married wife? Ooooooh yeeeaaaaaah. Elizabeth do you take this man as your lawful husband? She will. Savage places the ring on Elizabeths finger and repeats the vows. The vicar then declares them husband and wife and they embrace in a kiss. Lovely. Streamers fall from the ceiling as Savages music plays. What a wonderful wedding.

 

And that was the fourth annual Summerslam. Overall I enjoyed this card a lot. The first match set the tone for the night and the second was a fantastic technical match. The tag matches involving The Legion of Doom and The Natural Disasters were both above average whilst the rest of the card was about average barring the Valentine/IRS stinker. We had in ring PPV debuts for both IRS and General Adnan whilst the likes of Ricky Steamboat and The Iron Sheik returned to action.

There were a few missing faces, some missed more than others. The likes of The Rockers, Haku, The Barbarian, The Bezerker, Jim Neidhart, The Undertaker, Jake Roberts, The Orient Express and Rick Martel in particular were nowhere to be seen. The show was by far the best Summerslam so far and ranks highly on the all time PPV list. It definitely started better than it finished as the main event was one of the weakest if not the weakest ever.

Although lacking in quality, the main event and the Boss Man/Mountie did have big fight feels to them and really the only match that seemed out of place on this card was the IRS/Greg Valentine contest.

Overall Rating: 54/100 (4th out of 22)